Back to where I first came alive

“I’ve come back this morning to where I first came alive

Here within this terminal where the buses arrive

I was a commuter on the 804, worked for a computer on the 19th floor and…” 🎵

I didn’t really pay attention to the lyrics of this song but I really love the melody. It is just relaxing. I didn’t pay attention to the lyrics of it until one relaxing day, I was listening to it and this part caught my attention “But I had to get home to the kids and the wife and…” so I wondered “Ohmygosh the man is married?” I had listened to it a lot of time and always catch only the first part “I’ve come back this morning where I first came alive” and I thought it was some kind of a “meet-cute” love story of a teenager but then “He’s married?”. So, I checked on the comments on Youtube and here are some of the comments that made me smile.  

“The main reason kung bakit masarap pakinggan ‘yong mga awitin noon kasi nakikinig ka na ng kanta, at the same time ay nakikinig ka rin ng k’wento. Not unlike sa mga karamihang awitin ngayon na hanggang sa natapos ay hindi mo man lang nakuha ‘yong sense.”

“When a song talks to you… just feel it… let the magic of the words and each note take you in. You’d rarely find a song that would talk to you as if it wants to tell you a story nowadays.” (kind of rare these days or maybe I just don’t pay enough attention to them)

“My mom would sing this song with tears in her eyes… it has so much much to do with my dad who passed away 22 yrs ago..we missed him dearly…😢” (aweee the tears in her eyes would have been me too had I embraced my inclination for these kinds of song back to those days when I was emotionally too vulnerable)

“I grew up listening to any kind of genre. I always love listening to old songs. Makes me imagine how’s life before i was born. Now im in my 20’s and I never get tired listening to these songs.”  (Me, too. I didn’t and until now, still don’t have any specific genre. If the melody catches my ear, I would immediately just love the song)

While listening to this music, it makes you wanna close your eyes and remember those old years that had gone by.. (same with me–just wanna remember those happy days)

This makes me want to go to a field of flowers and play in a radio listening to this and just appreciate life while I watch the cherry blossoms fall from the trees(me too, go somewhere where I see things moved by the blow of the wind)

“Nostalgic! A song of a man who cheated on his wife one day. He wanted more out of the relationship but the girl (I guess) realized that it was lust.”  (oh so yeah, he was really married ey?”

“The melody is really nice. You instantly think and wish to find love like this too! But if you dive within the lyrics and the message of it, its about a guy who met a girl and fell in love to her but he’s also committed to his wife and kids. Its about finding the right girl at the wrong time.”  (Ahhh so nothing happened to him and the girl, I am happy and admire him. I always admire men like him if this is the case — men who are like WRONG IS WRONG so I will never do it.)

“The guy in the song is a man of integrity otherwise if he had been just “half a man” he would’ve easily give in to the temptation. True admiration.” (I agree. If men were like this man, pain from being cheated on and divorce due to adultery would disappear haha)

So I’ve been wanting to listen to this song again since yesterday but I was able to finally tune in to it today and I can’t stop myself from smiling. This song still brings back good memories. I usually heard it while riding a bus from the south (our bukid) of Cebu going to the city. I would hear it sometimes before, after, or while “Ahhh, chicharon, bucarillo, ampao mo diha” is being sung along by the vendors of Carcar city. (Deeply, I would feel emotional seeing the vendors sometimes. I used to just wish I could buy everything or give them the money for everything they were selling and they could go home once and just be happy because my mother told us a story of how she or her friends had experienced being one in their youth and they would call it a happy day if they sold everything they had to). In high school, I usually heard it played on a radio station along with the other songs of my grandparents’ generations during afternoon naps/sleep.

So, every once in a while, there are days I feel like going back to these songs because of the calming feeling they give to me and the memories along with them.

Ahh it’s really true our environment plays a big role in our lives. Whatever we were constantly exposed to when we were growing up, regardless of whether we liked them or we chose not to like them because our peers were so cool they liked “emo” “punk rock” “hip hop” “Eminem” “avril” etc. and we were not brave enough to be outcasted just for our natural inclination to other kinds of music, we would really end up craving them because they are memories involuntarily ingrained in our soul and memories, happy childhood-growing-up memories are the best ones to come home to.

Now, every time I remember or hear this song it makes me smile because the melody is something resonating with my melodramatic soul. It is soothing and it just never gets old. 

Also, I felt so at home reading some of the relatable comments. The songs and the comments made me nostalgic that day I checked whether others have similar interpretations to mine. 

The title of the song is “Terminal” by Rupert Holmes. To be honest, if a guy I met or a friend or friends I am not so closed with asked me the songs I like , I used to say whatever comes to mind depending on my mood that time I was asked and would always exclude songs like this because I think they are not cool haha but these days, nah! Couldn’t care less!!!

How about you? Are there any songs you come home to, especially on days when you just want to be yourself and relax? What are those? 

Free yourself from the pressure of who and what you think the world wants you to be and just tune in to what makes you BeYOUtiful. Do you! Wander where your inspiration takes you and don’t forget to capture only the good vibes. 

—marymancee, 6-5-2022

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